Hi as I am away for 12 days on my apprentice training to learn how to train the process that I use in the community to enhance listening skills. I thought I would share with you today a testimonial from one of the mums who attended one of our workshops
Before attending the Step-by-Step Mothers and Daughters workshop I was worried about the way my relationship with my daughter was going. My beautiful little girl is only 8 years old but our ever-increasing arguments over trivial things made me think she had become a teenager early. I hated the way I spoke to/shouted at her, thinking I would not like to be spoken to like this! The times I left the school playground on the verge of tears because of an argument over getting ready for school or the state of her room. I was the adult in the situation yet it was me who could not let the issues go, making the rest of the morning miserable and huge guilt at how she must be feeling. I was starting to worry about how this was affecting her; does mummy love me or not? We have such similar characters it was as though we were just bashing against each other all the time. I then discovered Step by Step and Sheryl!
Me, go to a ‘counselling group’, I don’t need this I thought, I should be able to cope, she is my little girl after all. After chatting with the Step-by-Step team, myself and a very good friend who also has a ‘fascinating’ little girl, thought we should give this a go. The workshop was very relaxed and we were all ordinary everyday mums of children of varying ages and sex but I believe we all had one very important thing in common; we wanted to understand our children and ourselves to make things better.
The day after the session my husband said to me, ‘I know it’s only been less than a day but you seem more relaxed and the atmosphere in the house is much calmer’. He was so right. I came away from the workshop with an understanding of how my beautiful little girl was coping with growing up. How she was looking to us, my husband and I, to help her learn and develop socially, mentally and in so many other ways. I now take each situation that may have erupted before and make sure I look at it from her point of view as well as mine. Her room is now her sanctuary, her space to control when all other aspects of her life are organised for her; school, meals, daily routines etc. The school run goes like clockwork (most of the time) and we listen to each other. I have explained the workshop to her and why I felt I needed to go. We have empowered each other and now talk about how we are feeling and how we can help each other. We now have the tools in place for a positive route through childhood into adulthood and I really hope others just ‘give it a go’ too, it has made for a happier life which has got to be good.
Are you a mum of a child where communciations seem to be at shouting or not talking and there is no in between?
Leave your comments I guarantee you are not alone.